Parallel Hosts
by Silverfern500
Summary: What would happen if the boys had female counterparts? If they met - themselves - at school? This is meant to be just a 'parody' fic for fun.
1. Prologue

Parallel Hosts

Prologue

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We are the Host club sisters, and although we may not be related, we are as tight as family. You could say that blood has nothing on the water that bonds us. That's what our Brother-in-law said, anyway. It's true. Not even our relatives who pass us around could break the kinship we share. Of course, that sometimes causes a problem. Some of the people we stay with somehow get the idea that we should be split up. We disagree. They insist. We refuse. They use force. We rebel. They rid themselves of the problem.

Which is why all five of us are currently boarding a train to our aunt's estate. The younger ones don't think things will be any better this time, but I do. Right now it may be a stormy friday night, but come monday morning, we will be attending our first day at Ouran Senior Acadamy.

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(Woah, small opening, right? But I had to write it because it sets the tone for the story... almost. Anyway, don't worry, this is in no way meant to be an OCpairing story)


	2. Meeting the Kojima Twins

Meeting the Kojima Twins

Part 1

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"Let's play the which one is Mika-chan game!" Mika and Mira chorused in the crisp November air. They were tenth year girls that had just moved from Germany. Both were currently performing for a small gathered crowd in the courtyard, to pass the time before home room. Identical twins, nothing so much as a hair out of place could difference them in appearance. Which is why they found fun in making others guess between them, and also why their game was unfair in more than one way. First, neither had been around long enough for anyone to learn either's defining personalities (despite the half hour they had spent before-hand on introducing themselves). Second, the girls' looks and promised winning prize (a kiss) were enough to delude anyone into blindly playing.

Should a student walk across campus, he would see quite the spectacle. Two beauties possessing milk skin, rich amethyst eyes, sandy beach curls, and plump Popsicle lips; against some ordinary high-school boys. Both wearing cream sweater vests with black ties and skirts. It had been the uniform at the last school they had attended, showing that they were new. Should a student come along, he might be disgusted or confused. Because isn't there already a pair of twins - brothers- attending the academy?

"You're Mika-chan." a fellow tenth-year hesitantly decided, pointing to the girl on the right. He was a mousy boy with dark glasses and short brown hair slicked back. If he weren't wearing boy's clothes, one might suspect that he was in fact a she.

The girl in question pouted and crouched to the ground, lifting her hair behind her left shoulder. There, on her neck, sat a small mole. "No, I'm Mira." She squeaked miserably. "I'm a fourth of an inch shorter than sister, and a whole bra size larger. How could you mistake me for her?" Her tone was sad - some guys twitched, wanting to put a hand out for her - but Mira's real intent was to tick off her sister. It worked.

Mika scowled at her timid twin while smacking her upside the head. "No way." She growled, pulling Mira up by the ear (Which made her grunt in muted pain). "We're identically perfect, except for that stupid blemish of yours." By which Mika indicated the mole. If anyone had gotten the better genes, it had to be her, she grumbled to herself. Mika didn't mean to sound harsh, but she generally did. Her words could cut like daggers if she wanted them too.

Mira's eyes misted as she toppled on top of her sister. "Nii-chan…" She sniffed, thinking herself in trouble.

It was obviously an act, a stupid one, but apparently successful. Every eye was captivated by the scene in front of them. Mika's glare softened at the vulnerability of her sibling. "Oh no, I've said too much. Mira… forgive me?" Without waiting for an answer, she grabbed Mira hard around the waist; burying her face into the girl's shoulder.

The sudden embrace startled Mira, but she soon recovered enough to place her hands on her sister's back, returning the feeling. "Uh-huh." She nodded, allowing a fake tear to fall.

Most of the male crowd that surrounded the two erupted in nosebleeds as a reaction to the yuri moment in front of them. Mika smirked with delight at the uproar, gently patting her sister on the head for a job well done. When nobody was looking, the two pulled apart and gathered their stuff up. through the chaos the Kojima twins managed to calmly walk away, hand in hand. They didn't see the two boys who then broke from the group to follow.

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Sorry it's short... I just got the idea this morning, and even if it's rushed, it's really helping me with the writer's block I had... so hopefully I'll be able to go back to my usual - and much MUCH better writing - soon. I'm hesitant to split this chapter into two parts, since the Hitachiin twins aren't in the first part, but if I split it up then the second part can be longer... meaning more Hikaru and Kaoru, so that's good, right?

Please R&R! Next chapter soon! (I always thought that R&R meant rest and relax, not read and review... so when I say that this is R&R I mean that I want you to enjoy reading it!)


	3. Twins Kojima Meet Twins Hitachiin

Meeting the Kojima twins

Part 2

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After escaping, the girls had started wandering through the school halls.

"Morons." The elder girl (by six minutes) murmured to the younger.

"In every single way!" the younger agreed, snickering. Manipulating her peers (mainly boys) was one of her favorite pastimes, playing pranks being another. Still, she was a little sad that nobody could tell her and her sister apart. Only when she wore her hair up, which she rarely did, would they know that she was Mira. Or maybe if her and her family stayed around long enough this time, that they might make friends?

"We should meet up with the rest of the club." Mika announced thoughtfully after a while, stopping in the middle of the walkway of the second floor. She always knew when to be serious and when to be mischievous, well, usually. If that wasn't it, then she was sure good at covering up her mistakes. Like the fact that she had gotten them lost.

"But Hana and Minori are still asleep, Takako is being all… Takako with the upper class boys, and Noriko scares me…" Mira sighed, stopping as well. "Besides…" She lowered her voice, "we aren't alone." They both were probably equally as observant, because both were already aware of the shadows around the corner. The twins nodded in unison, they could deal with their other problems later.

"Let's play the which one is Mika-chan game." They called out together, facing the end of the hall. One after the other, the Hitachiin boys walked into the light. Neither said anything as they crossed their arms and stared. Just as the girls had thought, it really was them. Seeing the spectacle in the courtyard and having been bored, the two had come to investigate.

"Hikaru." Mika said looking towards Mira.

"And Kaoru." Mira answered, looking back.

Before the girls arrived at Ouran, they had done some research. Or, rather, Noriko had done some research. Noriko being the sixth in their club, had already been living in the area. She had greeted the others when they got off the boat, which they had taken after the train.

"Say, boys." Mika's eyes returned to Hikaru's.

"If you can't tell us apart," Mira continued, staring at Kaoru.

"You could always kiss us," Mika shrugged.

"Because we're wearing different flavored lip gloss!" Mira giggled.

The boys held their calm from the outburst, but Hikaru's eyes still went slightly wider, and Kaoru blushed.

The Girls giggled harder at them. The four were so alike that it was unnerving, a curiosity. Each pair wanted to know more about the other.

"You…" Kaoru strained.

"Just who the hell are you supposed to be?" Hikaru interrupted, annoyed.

The Kojima twins exchanged a glance before answering together, losing the playful attitude they'd been fronting, but not without the intent of messing with the guys. "We are Mika And Mira Kojima."

"Jeez, you would think that they would have heard us say that earlier…" Mika complained.

"We are members of the Female host club that just transferred here, pleased to meet you." Greeted Mira, cautiously approaching Kaoru to extend a hand in friendship. The hand was accepted. "And we want to get to know you and your famous club. Would you show it to us?"

Now it was the Hitachiin twins' turn to exchange a look. "Sure." They smiled.

"We'll take you to see it-" Hikaru started, suddenly standing behind Mika. She jumped, earning a throaty laugh from him.

"But first," Kaoru interjected, stepping closer to Mira.

"You mentioned a kiss." Finished Hikaru as he placed a hand on Mika's shoulder.

Before anyone could react, Kaoru had closed the distance between himself and Mira, and Hikaru had turned Mika around to kiss her as well. Then before anyone could push anyone else away, there was a loud shout from behind them all.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO OUR VALUED CUSTOMERS?!"

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Oi. Twins are even harder to write about than I had first thought... Which is why this is the last chapter that either sets of twins star in (but they'll probably pop into further chapters, wah!) Can you guess by the names mentioned earlier, who is who? R&R (Btw- this is STILL not an OCpairing! It's just them being, them, and besides... it gets Tamako mad XD)


	4. The King and Queen

Parallel Hosts, The King and the Queen.

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"…So you see, it really was our fault." Mira concluded while lifting a cup of tea to her lips.

"I… See. So such maidens like you do exist." Tamaki mused, chin on palm.

When Tamaki found the twins kissing the girls, he had immediately started reprimanding them, whilst whisking the 'young ladies' to the music room. This is where Mira calmly explained what had happened (Or she was trying to clear the hitachiin brothers' names), and where Mika broke off to chat with said boys.

Mira nearly choked on her drink. "Pardon?"

Realizing that he had been speaking aloud, the king himself nearly choked on recovering. "N-nothing, dear one. Nothing to worry your beautiful little head about, heh."

It didn't sound right so Mira narrowed her eyes and was about to answer, when the boy from the courtyard burst in.

"Tamaki- it's not like I care, but would you care to explain why there are female twins he-" S/he saw Mira talking to Tamaki. "Oh." S/he looked over to the hitachiin twins. "So it wasn't Hikaru and Kaoru crossplaying."

"Tamaki, who's this?" Mira pointed warily towards the boy(girl).

"This is Haruhi, our newest member." Tamaki answered, "Haruhi, would you be so kind as to get us more tea?" He handed him(her) the kettle.

Funny, thought Mira, Noriko never mentioned anything about a _girl_ being in the club.

"Haruhi Fujioka, I presume." Speak of the devil. There stood Noriko, just arriving on the scene. Although she wasn't alone because there stood Takako, complete with giddy smile. Both were eleventh years.

"So this is the boy who isn't a boy! So cute." Takako gleamed. "You're just so _darling_ in those clothes." She was looking at the male uniform Haruhi was wearing. "I guess I could fall in love." She giggled.

"Daddy does not approve!" Tamako immediately raged, standing up protectively in front of Haruhi. "You're both girls!"

"Oh, right." Takako pouted. The tall blonde moved to the corner of the room to brood.

"Sir," Noriko adjusted her glasses, and pushed a strand of dark brown hair out of her face. "Isn't it equally bad to fall in love with someone who works with or for you?" Of course she knew virtually everything about the host club, so she knew how Tamaki felt about Haruhi, too.

"I-" Tamaki spluttered. He blushed and went to join Takako in the corner.

Haruhi didn't get what they were talking about, of course, and blandly made it known with a,"Huh?"

"Girl," Noriko ignored her question. "Tell me where I can find Kyouya, please."

"Right here." Came a voice from the side, as a door shut. "You must be the new transfer students," He glanced around at the four girls, not counting Haruhi. "Most of them, anyway."

"Yes." She nodded. "We are a different club of female hosts, new transfers, and need to get a summary of our situation. We aren't used to there already being a host club at the schools we attend. Would you allow us to observe your activities for an allotted amount of time?"

So many words… Mira thought. She never liked being around Noriko, her speeches made Mira's head hurt. Which is why she got all her information from her sister, who was now staying far away with the twins.

"That should be fine." Kyouya, obviously not daunted by Noriko's big words, decided. "You may start when the remaining – two – members of your group arrive. Where are they?"

Takako's ears perked up and she, amazingly, recovered fast from depression. "Hana is still asleep, nobody wakes her up before 9 in the morning…" She shuddered. "And Minori is watching her. They're both twelfth years, but Hana never acts that way. Doesn't look it either." Her lips curved into a sweet motherly smile.

"I see." Kyouya wrote something down on his portable laptop.

"And you," Noriko spoke up. "Where are _your_ last two members?"

Man, she doesn't miss a thing. Mika was watching from her seat, having not moved. This is when Tamaki came back down to earth to notice what was going on, and recovered himself to join the others.

"Hani is asleep, just like your friend. And Mori is super protective of him, so they're together." Explained Tamaki.

"Alright" Noriko accepted, annoyed that it wasn't Kyouya that had answered.

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So you know that Noriko is Kyouya(sp?), Mika is Hikaru, Mira is Kaoru, Takako is Tamaki, Minori is Mori, and Hana is Hani by now, right? It is SO hard to write a story with so many main characters! But give me credit for trying, okay? And please ignore my mistakes- I'm only doing this one for fun, after all. R&R.


	5. Mean to be Sweet

Parallel Hosts; Mean to be Sweet

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"Ah, Cake!" Hana shouted triumphantly as she spotted the treat. "But, ah, isn't there anyone around to eat it?" The red-headed pixie spun around in circles, straining to find whoever might be the owner of such treat (Actually, she just didn't want to get caught). "Well…" the child-like girl considered thoughtfully, "waste not want not?" She beamed.

If one knew the girl's age, one might say that she did not look it. At all. For Hana is a third year, with the height of a middle school kid. Her specialties include art, violin, and making sweet things disappear. So the cake she mentioned earlier did not last long, and soon the girl was left looking for something new to do.

"Hmm, I should call Min-chan. She'll be worried when she wakes up to find me gone… but she looked so tired, I thought she should sleep, right?" Hana questioned herself.

It was then, as she was staring at the ceiling, that he came. The dark one. The furious one. The small one. The… honey sempai who's cake went missing.

"Strawberry…" The chill that swept over the room was truly remarkable, coming from such a darling boy.

"Huh?" Hana came to from her daydreaming, to see the looming shadow by the table where she had eaten.

"My strawberry… Cake. You ate it." The scary being clenched and unclenched his fists at his sides.

"I…" Hana's eyes got huge with fright. "I… did?" Her knees trembled, and she grabbed the hem of her dress for support.

"Why?" Was all the accuser asked.

"I…" Hana began again, and this time she broke down in tears. "I'm sorry! I didn't know it was yours, I was hungry, I didn't want it to go bad." Water streaming down her face, now.

Honey softened up immediately at the sight of tears and looked dazedly towards the empty cake plate, then back to the girl. "Oh." He walked to her. "Oh." He smiled, and hugged the girl tightly. "Okay then, Hani understands. You love sweets like me! Let's be best friends." Honey held Hana out at arms lengths, to wipe her eyes with his sleeve. "Right?"

"R-right." Truthfully, Hana was completely shocked. "Yeah!" Her mouth curled into a weak smile, which the boy took with joy.

"Yay! Then lets go play, um," He still didn't know her name so he frowned in concentration.

"Hana." She nodded with satisfaction at it.

He nodded back. "Hana-chan, pretty. I'm Hani. Let's have fun."

Honey took Hana's hand and turned to lead her away, right into Mori's chest.

"……" _I found you _(Does he ever talk???) Mori grunted at the boy, arms crossed.

"Oh, Mori! Lookie, I made a new friend!"

Mori turned his attention on the girl. "………" _I see, good for you. I'm proud._

"Thanks! I think so to." Honey grinned (seriously, am I the only one who doesn't get this silent communication thing?) "I'm gonna show her the courtyard, is that okay?"

"……" _Be safe. _Mori gave a slight nod.

"I will!" Honey giggled, while leading Hana around the muscular and much taller student.

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Such short chapter.... but really, what more could I do with Honey .? Well don't worry, Mori and Minori get their own chapter and Tamaki and Takako will talk by themselves later too. I really don't want to leave Kyouya alone with Noriko though, so..... R&R!


	6. A Silent Knight

Parallel Hosts, A Silent Knight

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"Hana!" a shout came with echoing footsteps. The name was called once more, with a following 'ooph' as the speaker knocked right into Mori's back. The tall boy grunted and turned around, it was the second time he had been run into that day.

"!!!" The dazed lady stepped back, her black ponytail swaying to one side. "….oops" _you're tall._

"Right…" Mori answered, monotone. _So what? You're just as tall._

She looked around and then back to the boy who matched her in height. "Um…" She put her hand low on the ground. "Where…?" _have you seen a girl this short go by?_

Mori got her notion and thumbed over his shoulder. _They went that way_.

"…?" She responded by creasing her forehead, _they?_

"Mori." The boy held out his hand.

"…Minori." The girl took it with approval. "Hana…?" Her eyes shifted to behind Mori.

"Hana." _And friend._ He confirmed.

"Okay..." _Bye._ And just like that she was off again running.

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I take what I said last chapter back. I'm sorry that _this_ chapter is so short (I'll pick up the content/word count, I promise!) So far this is the shortest chapter, but I mean, they don't talk! Communication, people, it makes the world go round... On an unrelated note, I'm reading OHSHC volume 12 right now and it's so cute! R&R.


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